These last few months have been some of the darkest and loneliest days of my life. Knowing there is a reason why I felt so strongly about moving to this new city, where I hardly know anybody, while I'm fighting this disease, and than getting diagnosed with another one. I'm trying my hardest not to give up, even though that seems like the easiest thing to do right now. I'm thankful for my parents, the handful of friends that have stuck around, doctors who aren't giving up on me. and having the knowledge of the gospel.

While I was dealing with a disease I had the feeling I needed to move to Logan which happens to be a city where I know very few people. I've been diagnosed with another disease. 

Giving up seems like the easiest and most comfortable thing to do right now. Living in a city where I still hardly know anybody while fighting a disease and just recently being diagnosed with another one is incredibly hard.

These last few months have been some of the darkest, scariest, and loneliest days of my life.  Moving to a new city (I felt so strongly it's where I need to be), where I still hardly know anybody. Fighting a disease and being diagnosed with another one. It's incredibly hard. I'm trying my hardest not to give up, even though it seems like the easiest thing to do right now.

these last few months have been some of the darkest, scariest, and loneliest days of my life.'s been hardmovign to a city I've felt so strongly is where I need to be where I still don't hadly know anybody while fighting and illness and being diagnosed with another one I'm trying m hardest ot stay positive and not give up even though giving up seems like the easiest thing to do right now I'm moving forward in faith and trusting in my heavenly fathe there has to be a reason hy im going through these trials that will make it all worth it.y single day.

just getting out of bed is a struggle every single day.
I want to leave now. I don't want to be here.

 I have reached out to church goers and they don't want to deal. There is a stigma placed on it.
The last few months have been ironic. My testimony of the gospel is the strongest it has ever been but at the same time I have never wanted to leave the church so much in my life. Church is supposed to give me peace , right? For me, no matter how optimistic and upbeat I try to beat, church is the place that gives me the most stress and anxiety. Home wards. Single wards are a constant reminder that I'm not married so therefore I am expected to have a degree at my age. THE EXPECTATIONS ARE RIDICULOUS.
The girl who sits in he car

My first actual attempt, the night before graduation. If you would have seen me the next day you would have never guessed that I had tried to take my life. I woke up furious.
Taking a toll on my personality and relationships.
Depression is not just a mental illness. It is a physical one.